Monday, September 29, 2008

Golf Digest Ranks Top 100 Musician-Golfers, Haven't Heard Of A Lot of the Musicians


Periodically, Golf Digest will come up with the occasional "Who the best _____ golfer is?" list and it usually deals with actors or other professional athletes or nannies. This month they've come up with the top-100 Musicians, and I have to be honest, some of the names don't get your foot-a-tappin'.

Here are the notables and their handicaps.

2. Kenny G - 0.0
4. Vince Gill - 0.8
11. Alice Cooper - 5.3
(I've seen this dude swing -- no way I'm buying 5.3)
t-15. Josh Kelley and Justin Timberlake - 6
t-25. Michael Bolton - 9
(Will never hear that name without thinking "no talent assclown")
t-43. Pat Green and George Strait - 11
t-86. Meat Loaf and Steve Miller - 21
(Do you think when Meat Loaf is at a course and they announce his group on the first tee, they say, "Mr. Loaf"?)
t-96. Kid Rock - 36 (This video will do.)

Ok, a few names that look familiar. Now, what about some of these other people that I have honestly never heard of.

1. Rudy Gatlin - +1.3 (This is his website. Do you think they pay per square inch?)
3. Marty Roe - 0.2 (He's on Diamond Rio. They sing a song called "Beautiful Mess." Thought that was pretty ironic.)
7. Steve Gatlin - 3.4 (Yeah, another member of the "Gatlin Brothers.")
t-31. Bransford Marsalis - 9.4 (It doesn't even say what band he's in, just that he's a saxophonist. I sing in my car, can I be on the list?
t-57. Dean Felber - 12.1 (I'm sorry, until Hootie and the Blowfish comes out with another decent hit (and decent is being stretched mighty thin right there), they cannot occupy three spots on this list.)
100. Shakira - 40 (Yes, I know who she is, but what the Digest said about her is too good to pass up. "if "Hips Don't Lie" video is any indication, flexibility won't be a problem.")

Alright, that is all. Carry on with your exciting Monday morning.

2 comments:

niel said...

"no talent assclown"

Is that your real name??

Kim Plaintive said...

Niel Nagga...naggonnaworkhereanymore!