Wednesday, March 4, 2009

A Few Things That Kill Me About "Tin Cup"


Last night, I was pretty tired and had been thinking all day that it had been a while since I sat down and watched "Tin Cup." Honestly, no matter the heartbreaking (and unbelievable) ending, the movie has always been one of my favorite sports movies, mostly because it revolves around the psychotic behavior of golfers and the fact that I've played most of the golf courses in the movie (Kingwood and Tucson nods).

I just decided to jot down a few things that really do kill me in the movie.

--Okay. So he owes his stripper ex-girlfriend $12,000 so he sells her the driving range for $10,000. She is quoted as saying something like, "Say the driving range is worth $10 (thousand). You still owe me $2 (thousand)." The next image is him going to the pawn shop (on 4th Ave. in Tucson, nonetheless) and selling his clubs. Then, he plays the guy at the country club with the random instruments for $400 and goes and gets his clubs back. What gives there?

--Obviously, the entire "breaking the club" part. If you are a caddy you have to agree with your player. No caddy on tour would tell his player they couldn't hit a shot, even if they knew the guy couldn't hit that shot. Just ask Jean Van de Velde.

--The road Simms hits the ball down is a one lane road. It doesn't exactly look paved like an interstate. The guy takes a full swing with a 7-iron and doesn't even take off his jacket? The ball could miss the road completely, hit once and kick straight sideways or bounce a couple of times and fall off the road. I'd say the percentages of hitting a golf ball up a road without it bouncing off has to be less than 8 percent, even for a golf pro.

--The shanking part. This guy is a golf pro. If you have ever shanked a golf shot on a driving range, you know exactly what the next shot is. The direct toe job. You smoke that bad boy on the toe just so it doesn't hit the hosel.

--Can you drink in an Winnebago if you aren't driving? If not, that sure does make me more interested in owning a Winnebago.

--If you are worried you might be shanking the ball on the driving range at the U.S. Open, why in the hell would you go to the far left side of the tee? I'd be as near that white gate as possible, so I could just shank the ball into the fence.

--You show up at a U.S. Open, in hopes of winning the tournament and the heart of your woman, and you play NO practice rounds? This isn't the celebrity tournament in Tahoe.

--"We should have set an alarm," is what Romeo says as they are running to the first tee. Again, this is the U.S. Open ... probably the right time to not set an alarm.

--Romeo mentions Roy is the "first one off" on Thursday. That means, he'd be last off on Friday. If he is finishing up on 17 and 18, nobody else should really be on the course, yet they are.

--A par-72 means the 83 had Roy at 11-over. Alright, so he shoots 62 on Friday (right). Now he's one-over. On the 18th on Saturday, McAvoy's sign says he is 7-under. That means, his Saturday round is eight-under. That's a 64! Nobody is talking about how he went 62-64 in the U.S. Open? Riiiight.

--McAvoy is the first guy out hitting range balls on Sunday. U.S. Open Sunday tee times are LATE. He is in the final group. Just saying ...

--It isn't really worth talking about the last hole thing except this. How in the hell does a ball roll back in the pond on the 18th hole with a 3-wood? It lands like two feet! If a ball couldn't stay on that green with a 3-wood, there is ZERO way anyone would be able to hold a wedge. It is almost a better play to try and hit a no spin wood from 240 than try and hit a knuckleball wedge up there.

Alright, that is all. If you have any, please add them on.

52 comments:

The Armchair Golfer said...

Ha! You poked just a few holes in Tin Cup. Good observations. I have nothing to add, except that I've always liked Rene Russo. Sorry, that's all I've got.

spencer096 said...

nice.

Jason said...

Don't forget that the US Open is a Par 70, making that -7 even tougher...

Shane B. said...

Well, US Opens can be par-70s but I guess they don't have to.

(Pebble in '92 for instance, even though it has since been changed, so maybe I'm just an idiot)

Jason said...

I guess I should have said that they are usually Par 70. I checked Wikipedia, and yes, the 92 Open at Pebble was a Par 72 (the 2000 Open at Pebble was a Par 71). Oakmont was Par 71 in 94, but Par 70 in 07. Earlier than that, there are a handful of courses that were Par 71 or 72, so maybe Tin Cup was at one of those courses. I don't remember if they name it in the movie.

Shane B. said...

Haha, I know it was in "North Carolina" even though the course was really Deerwood in Houston.

niel said...

Jim Nantz, Ken Venturi, and Gary McCord calling the US Open? Bizarre!

Unknown said...

It has Kevin Costner in it.

All other "things that kill me" pale in comparison.

JC said...

Here is another that kills me. When Cup is hitting practice balls on the range, presumably BEFORE the start of the Open, and begins shanking them--Romeo makes a comment to Johnny Miller about shooting a "nice opening round." How could this be if the first round is the day after. Irritates me every time.

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