Shut Up David Feherty

A couple of days again, David Feherty published his monthly column on Golf.com, a thing that I have never got into because it reads too much like Rick Reilly. (Example? "That being said, I've been trying to think of an equivalent example of the grim, ghastly, gleeful, and positively gloat-ridden coverage of a prominent public figure's fall from grace." Hey look everyone, I know what alliteration is!!)

Feherty's story was about Tiger and the media, and how, I'm sure this will surprise you, the bloggers and media hounds are jerks and have nothing better to do and sit in basements and eat meatloat their mothers make them! How could we ever report on such a story as Tiger, the most popular athlete in the world, cheating on his wife and completely changing the public perception of him 180 degrees?! We are such dogs.

Here, let us dive in.

By comparison, Bill Clinton got off with a slap on the trouser-trout, and he was in charge of the free world! I guarantee you, the only thing Tiger Woods is in charge of right now is a border collie named Taz.

This argument is dead because when the Clinton news hit, the Internet was still a baby. Blogs weren't mainstream, everyone didn't have a voice, and we all checked CNN and ESPN for our news. Broken argument -- let us continue ...

Now, I'm not a total nimrod, and I know there won't be many opportunities like this for these bottom-feeders to gorge themselves on, so I understand the initial frenzy, but come on, people, can we move on a little bit? Would it be this bad if they found out the Pope had been having his crosier cleaned by Barbara Walters? I think not.

First, well done with the "bottom-feeders" dig. Nothing like slandering people that get paid to report on athletes and what is going on, when the most popular athlete in the world does something completely against his personality (or so we thought).

Second, I have absolutely no idea why Feherty insisted on picking the Pope and Barbara Walters as his deviously sexual act, but I can tell you that I'm not hungry for lunch anymore. Thanks, bro.

Also, it is this point where Feherty goes on some rant about psychology, and Nietzsche and absolute right and wrongs. Honestly, it seemed more of an attempt at patting himself on the back for his extensive knowledge on the mind than any real revelation about Tiger or the media. Basically, Feherty is condemning people about the Tiger coverage and how we can't let anything go and how, who are we to say he isn't perfect when we too aren't perfect!

Feherty ends with this line.

But the point is, Zeus was the king. Flawed he may have been, but he came through unscathed. I hope our king does too, because there is nothing mythic about him. He too is flawed, but thankfully for golf, he is real.

This is the stuff that kills me about these "holier than thou" writers. They pick on blogs and publishers like myself for calling Tiger out for shit he shouldn't have done. Listen, obviously we were disappointed in Tiger, mainly because we all felt something a little closer with him, like he was some being greater than us, and in a way, he was. That doesn't change that fact that almost everyone is ready for him to return, and dominate, and remind us that no matter where he sticks his pecker, his golf game is that of legends.

Tiger fucked up. I agree on that, you agree on that and I'm sure Feherty, once he dismounts from the very high horse he is on, would agree on that. That isn't to say we as a media were wrong to report on it. We were doing our job, just like Feherty was doing his by not speaking on it. I'm not sitting here bashing David for avoiding the subject. I'm bashing him because, like a lot of old journalists too busy reading their newspapers and not busy enough scouring the Internet, he forgot that things change. This is our world, this is our medium and this is what happens.

If Feherty can't grasp that, then I guess he needs to spend more time hanging with Barbara and the Pope, and less time trying to join my world. It obviously scares him.