Can I Trade My Prius for a Buick?

Oh, how youngsters grow.

Hunter Mahan notched his first career PGA Tour victory on the Big Boys Tour while Dobson Ranch native Chez Reavie broke through on the Nationwide.

The good news – Mahan went from solid college player making checks on the PGA Tour to President Cup hopeful and Reavie has all but locked up his PGA Tour card, going from 19th to fifth on the money list.

Now onto the Buick Open, an event where the main attraction is a guy that wears huge black button-up shirts and appeals to as many women as Horatio Sanz.

A few storylines going in this week :

Furyk’s Freaky Side - Never underestimate the power of a Wildcat. Jimmy hasn’t won this year, but has notched seven top-10s at Warwick Hills. Being the headliner, will Mr. Furyk pull through after a second at the U.S. Open?

Charles (Was) In Charge - Remember when Charles Howell III was cashing checks like a Chase in Times Square? Well, Like A-Rod, Howell has cooled, even shooting a third round 80 at the Memorial before withdrawing. The kid wonder has been cut three of his last six events and has finished over par in eight of his last nine tourneys. Howell plays on confidence and needs a good finish to get it back.

DiMarco Di-Done - Remember when Chris DiMarco should have won the 2005 Masters over Tiger Woods? That chip was oh-so-close to dropping on 18. Well, the fluctuating Florida Gator has only three top-25s this year, and is ranked 100 or more in every stat except putting. I hope he doesn’t read this and start yelling at me through the computer.

There ya go – enjoy the Buick or just continue to think about the British…it shall be here soon enough.

Yawn, 62, When is Carnoustie?

Day one at the Travelers Championship is complete, and Hunter “I Just Woke Up For My Profile Picture” Mahan smoked the steroid-ridden field.

Yep, Mahan’s eight-under 62 was the best of the day, two shots ahead of everyone’s least favorite golfer, Chris DiMarco (I will never forgive you Chris…you will forever be on my shit list).

Probably the best surprise of the day was Carl Pettersson’s 5-under 65, seeing as though I just called him out as the would-be Mickelson of the group. Again, looking at guys like Pettersson makes the whole steroid investigation look like a one-man hunt. I really can’t wait until he gets called in for the test – if I were the doctor, I’d have to laugh.

Mr. Happy, Vijah Singh, shot a two-under 68 and is in a tie for 28th place, with the only other notable, Zach Johnson carding a one-over 71.

"Club Down Because You're on Steroids"

It’s a wonderful Thursday morning with the Travelers Championship underway, which can only mean one thing – steroids?

Huh? Steroids in golf?

From the Associated Press, “The PGA Tour is getting closer to a rule on performance-enhancing drugs, and with testing likely to follow, commissioner Tim Finchem says golf organizations around the world should make sure they’re on the same page.”

I find it convenient that this came the week after Tiger Woods did his best SI Swimsuit model impersonation with the painted-on red golf shirt.

Anyway, this announcement could affect dozens of people worldwide, and my first investigation would have to focus on Peter “Popeye” Lonard (forearms a hoy!).

Travelers Championship FEVER

I hope I’m not the only one that finds it ironic that this week’s tournament is coined the Travelers Championship, and everyone worth watching will be, well, traveling somewhere else.

Actually, it looks like Phil Mickelson will be in the field…uhh, never mind, that’s just Carl Pettersson.

Anyway, this weeks PGA Tour tourney includes the likes of Vijay Singh, Zach Johnson and Kyle Reifers. I am starting to think Vijay has no home and just takes two hour naps between hitting range balls.

The best thing about weeks like this is someone random has a chance to cash in on their first PGA victory, and with that, grab a trip to the Mercedes Championship and a nice little two-year exemption.

If I had to put money on a long shot, I’d go with Ryan Moore. The kid is destined to win sometime this season and he best do it now when Tiger is still infatuated with Sam. Wait till the little princess starts pooping nine times a day Tiger – then you’re going to be using that “have to go hit some range balls, it’s my job” excuse way more than you had hoped.

Michelle Wie, Check the Rearview

Good news, if you’re into birthing news. Tiger Woods and his wife, Elin, just announced on tigerwoods.com that Sam Alexis Woods was born to this beautiful, billionaire world.

Some thought that the little girl would be entering this world around British Open time, but it appeared that Oakmont creates headaches and induces labor. Honestly, I think it had something to do with Angel Cabrera that made Elin’s water break.

Anyway, congrats El Tigre on being a poppa and good luck with all the added responsibilities that is quick to come. The one thing that Tiger can lean on if everything gets a little heavy – Elin has a twin!

Slump Talk

This is my favorite time of year. The sun is shinning high, the pools are packed with bikinis and sportscasters have nothing better to do than start talking about Tiger’s “slump.”

It really makes sense if you think about it. He’s only won three of the nine tournaments he has entered, finishing second in two others (both majors), and in the top-15 in two others. What does that mean? S-L-U-M-P! In related news, Vince Chase only got to third base this afternoon with a Playboy model – somebody get G.L.A.D. on the phone!

I blame all of this on Rory Sabbatini. If he hadn’t started the whole “more beatable than ever” nonsense then nobody in the media would have come up with this notion on their own.

Tiger has had one year when he “slumped” and that was in 1998, when he was revamping his swing so that he could knock out the Tiger Slam two years later. Winning a third of the events you enter and finishing second in two others isn’t slumping. If that still doesn't do it for you, think about it like this - since 2001 Tiger has yet to win more than three events through the U.S. Open. Actually, three events is pretty much par for Tiger, doing the same in '02, '03, '05 and now '07.

I just thought this needed to be clarified. If over the next few days people are bringing this up around the water cooler, either walk away or punch the person in the face. The choice is up to you.

How People "Relate" With Angel Cabrera

I hope I'm not the only one that finds it absolutely, eh, AMERICAN that ESPN and it's daily television shows find it imperative to focus on the fact that Angel Cabrera smokes. I mean, isn't it a little sad that the mass media must find a comfortable medium with a foreign champion so it focuses on one of his bad habits instead of the fact that HE JUST WON THE GODDAMN U.S. OPEN OVER TIGER WOODS?!?!

Again, Cabrera was the only player in top 20 and one of only two golfers on Sunday to break par. Also, Cabrera was the only golfer in the entire tournament to shoot two rounds under 70.

No matter if you’re one of those patriotic sports fans that want an American to take home the national championship or a golfer that loves when El Tigre steps up and takes home the big tournaments, Cabrera proved the theory that follows our current U.S. Open trends. The harder the golf course, the more it opens up the field. If the USGA continues to make these golf courses this difficult, you will see more and more random golfers at the top of these leader boards (i.e., Niclas Fasth, Bubba Watson, and Nick Dougherty in the top 10). That isn’t a horrible thing – we have learned to love the Geoff Ogilvy’s of this world along with the Jason Gores and Watsons. These guys are why the tournament has local and sectional qualifying and, like Roy McAvoy says, is the most democratic golf tournament in the world.

Next month we get to watch the burnt out fairways and deep bunkers of Carnoustie, but right now lets appreciate a solid four days by an unknown character. Seeing Angel cover his mouth after his near hole-out on the 15th hole might have been the best moment of the entire tournament.

Charles McGrath/Getty Images

Angel Whips the Tiger

By now you have probably heard that Tiger Woods DID NOT win the U.S. Open at Oakmont. The winner, Angel Cabrera, outlasted the rest of the field to win his first major on a course thats name should be changed to the Green Mile.

Si.com and ESPN.com both have the same title, "Last Man Standing," and sadly, this is about how you explain the final round.

I said early Sunday morning that if Tiger hit the ball half as well as he did on Saturday, he'd take home his 13th major. Well, he hit the ball about 13 percent as good and still only lost by one shot. Woods only had one birdie in his final round, with a tap-in birdie on the fourth hole. The King of Golf had his chances, but just kept playing conservative (as you should in a U.S. Open) and couldn't convert a birdie on the short 17th hole after hitting three-wood in a greenside bunker.

No matter what you say about Cabrera, he was the only player in the top 19 that shot a round under 70. People might talk about his bogey-bogey close on 16 and 17, but the cigarette smoking Argentinian made enough birdies early in his round for the buffer.

Poor Jim Furyk...if the guy makes par on 17 and 18 he is playing in a playoff today. Well, he tried to drive the 17th green and makes bogey, losing the tournament on a 300 yard par-4. Golf is a cruel sport.

Looking back, Oakmont is just as tough as everyone said it would be. I'm pretty sure as the pros wake up this Monday morning they will all be happy to give the Green Mile back to the members. Enjoy your crazy bitch, Oakmont members.

So Far, So Interesting

Yes, Aaron Baddeley did throw up on himself on the first hole today at the U.S. Open. Yes, I was worried that he might not break 100 after his initial triple-bogey. No, Badds hasn't committed another error today, going par-par-par and sitting pretty in the fifth fairway.

Tiger Woods did his best Badds imitation, going solid drive-airmail iron shot-blade chip-chunk chip-putt-putt for his first double-bogey of the entire tournament. A birdie on the par-5 fourth has got him without two shots of leaders Angel Cabrera, Stephen Ames and Steve Stricker.

I better go ahead and publish this post before I have to change the leaders, since we're seeing more bogeys today than Father's Day wishes.

I'll keep you posted as it keeps getting interesting.

Donald Miralle, Getty Images

Lot of Shots After One Hole

Man....whew....ehhhh...No way....

All thoughts going through my head after Aaron Baddeley played the first hole. Bad drive, blocked second shot from the rough, clicked chip, muffed bump and run, putt, putt, putt...that equates to a 7.

The guy just went from two shots up to one shot down, giving Tiger Woods the lead way before you would have liked to see him haev it.

Man, golf is a cruel sport.

More to come...

Credit: Fred Vuich/SI

Sunday Bloody Sunday

If the early morning scores are any indication of what we should expect this afternoon, it might actually be golf worth watching.

Anthony Kim is 2-under through seven holes, along with five other golfers under par on their rounds thus far. The other side of the coin - Rory Sabbatini is carding the worst round of the day, at only 2-over through nine holes.

If the USGA decided that bogey golf is boring golf, they probably watered the course last night and made it playable for the Sunday rounds.

This can only benefit Tiger Woods, who seems to have figured out his swing, hitting a few greens yesterday on his way to a 1-under 69 that was the worst possible score he could have posted, even if he had decided to putt one-handed on the back nine.

If he hits the ball half as decent today as yesterday, I think an evening post will be talking about a 13th major.

Credit: John Biever/SI

On the Verge

Uh oh…I hear that noise again. It’s that intimidating, anticipated poetic jingle that Tiger Woods brings when he makes his way up the leader board.

I know that it is easy to root for Tiger Woods when he approaches what could be his 13th major championship, but the guy is everything good in athletics. Tiger NEVER does anything wrong. He never fakes it, he never answers incorrectly, he never does the wrong thing and he is everything right with the new age role model. Maybe my favorite part about Tiger – he is always Tiger. He swears when he hits bad golf shots. He says he’s “pissed” when he finishes with a bad hole or when he finds Elin with another man misses the cut. Tiger is probably everything right with golf. I can’t think of someone else that represents his sport with more integrity than Mr. Woods.

With that said, it will be hard to root against a guy like Aaron Baddeley. Besides those horrendous MacGregor ads (BADDDDDS!), the guy appears to be a solid individual and from around the town, have heard he really walks how he talks.

No matter what happens tomorrow, Baddeley has proved himself to be a golfer no one should take lightly. Rounds of 70-70 on Friday and Saturday at Oakmont Mortuary show that the kid has a lot more than just a catchy nickname. My bottom line about this – you can never hold it against a person that goes against a legend. Paired with the best golfer to ever hold a cord grip, nobody expects Aaron to win this thing. It’s at the toughest course in America (sorry Bethpage Black, you’re old news at this point), with the toughest competitor of all time nipping at your heels and guys like Jim Furyk and David Toms just hoping for a solid round. It is under the most excruciating conditions that a golfer can stand, with the most pressure anyone will ever feel. Plus, you had to hang out all night, the next morning and all afternoon thinking about leading the U.S. Open. If Badds can pull things thing off, it would be more than just a trophy.

What to think? I guess we will soon find out.

Credit: Robert Beck/SI

This Could Be the Last Fist-pump of the Week

If Angel Cabrera, Bubba Watson or Tiger Woods are up and looking for something to scare the living hell out of them, they should just check the U.S. Open scores.

Zach Johnson started the day bogey-triple bogey, while 2005 champion Michael Campbell bogeyed the first, made par on two and then double on three.

Yeah, I don't think Oakmont is going to let anyone go up her skirt today. If anything, that chastity belt should be as tight as ever.

Photo courtesy of Simon Bruty/SI

Does Mickelson have IT?

I hate to compare great athletes, but here you have it. Phil Mickelson misses the cut in the 2007 U.S. Open in eerily similar fashion to what Tiger Woods did in 2006.

Tiger shot rounds of 76-76 (152) in ’06 while Mickelson finished his attempt at Oakmont with rounds of 74-77 (151). Tiger was bothered with the death of his father last year while Mickelson struggled with the physical pain of his wrist the past few weeks.

The bottom line – Tiger decided to go all 2000 on us, winning the British Open and PGA Championship during a seven tournament-winning streak. Missing the cut in the national championship truly pissed off Woods, lighting a fire under his ass that you don’t see much in individual sports (You almost expect a similar thing to happen in Wimbledon this month if Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal meet and Federer spanks him like an P.E. teacher).

Do you think there is any way that this, missing the cut in very un-Phil fashion, could light a fire under Lefty? The guy has been to third base over the last year at majors and just can’t seal the deal. Does Lefty have that devil on his shoulder that erases his cheesy smile for a few months and replaces it with a Jack Nicholson smirk?

Can this injury/missed cut/embarrassment prove to be the thing that volts Mr. Mickelson into the major maestro that Tiger has coined? Many questions, only one way to answer – production.

John Biever/SI

Man, My Wrist is Starting to Hurt

Day two is history, and so are the following names : Luke Donald, Phil Mickelson, Sean O'Hair, Davis Love III, Colin Montgomerie, Adam Scott and Sergio Garcia.

The two names that are leading this crazy ass circus tournament - Angel and Bubba. Hold on, let me check that again....yep, Angel and Bubba are leading the 2007 U.S. Open (somewhere at a golf course in Heaven, Bobby Jones and Byron Nelson are rolling their eyes).

Nobody is under par and unless Angel holes out for eagle on the first hole, we shouldn't see another golfer in red until Tiger Woods wears it on Sunday. Speaking of El Tigre, he shot 74 and is only five shots back, tied at 13th position.

The round of the day was Paul Casey's 4-under 66, with Stephen Ames carding the only other second round score under par with a 69.

What happened to Nick Dougherty after he got to 3-under for the tournament with a birdie on his fourth hole? Well, he finished with six bogeys and a double to shoot hockey sticks.

Bottom line - this course looks like about as much fun as Nair-ing my 5 o'clock shadow. Wouldn't you love to be a fly on the wall as the Oakmont members gather to play a game of Snooker tonight? I'm sure those guys are kookier than Dr. Kevorkian.

Guys to watch come Saturday - Cabrera (E), Chad Campbell (+5), Tiger (+5), and Lee Janzen (+6).

Photo courtesy of Simon Bruty/SI

Oakmont Might Take the Place of Coal in Your Stocking

Since most of the morning flight is making their way to the back nine, I think it is time to check out some of the "scores" from Day Two.

Paul Casey is the only player of the day under par, finding himself three-under (LORD HAVE MERCY) for the day with only four holes to go. Casey has only one bogey and has strung off five straight pars on his second nine. If Casey finishes up three-under, he will be four-over for the tournament and be host to the best round of the tournament.

Also, Aaron Baddeley, Kevin Sutherland and Steve Stricker are even on their round.

With the cut projected at +5 and probably moving to 7 or 8 by the end of the day, lets take a look at some of the golfers that aren't going to make the cut.

Brett Quigley shot 78 in the first round and is 11-over through 11 holes today. Steve Marino shot a 59 in last year's Gateway Tour Championship, but might post a little higher than that at Oakmont. He is 17-over for the tournament, eight-over today. Also, for you that picked Adam Scott, maybe you should quit gambling. The Kid is +8 today and +14 for the week.

Whew...that is a lot of addition signs.

Getty Images photo

H.C. Fownes is Still Most Hated Man In Golf

So, Day Two is underway and I just heard Chris Berman (is he really in the booth this week…what next, Tanya Harding) say that five-over was a “really good score through 27 holes.”

Would you really want to be known as the golf course that brings more talk about difficulty than golf shots? I guess the members at Oakmont enjoy it, but I promise you that smiling while others cry is one thing I learned not to do when I was a wee little golfer.

If you want to check out some Day Two themes, check out Sons of Sam Malone and read up on what you should anticipate over the next 12 hours.

Enjoy!

Photo courtesy of John Biever/SI

Deep Breath....Ohhhkay

Are you ready for this? Ok, everybody that has visited Oakmont over the past couple of centuries has talked about the toughness of the venue. Well, Day One has ended, and only two (2, dos, due, duo, deux, do, שתיים, dua, Remddu) golfers finished under par. Yep, that’s right, Day ONE has finished and only Nick Dougherty and Angel Cabrera were in red figures.

I hate to say this, but 20 over might win this thing. With all due respect, do you think there is any way Dougherty and Cabrera are on the leader board come Sunday? God love ‘em, but Jose Maria Olazabel (Even), Vijay Singh (+1), Tiger Woods (+1) and Geoff Ogilvy (+1) have to be the best looking golfers for your office pool right now in the top 20.

Not to sound too much like Jason Sobel, but Oakmont is going to win this thing by the end of the weekend, if not by Thursday around 7 AM.

Whoever first stated the words “double bogey” is resting peacefully in his grave right now.

Photo courtesy of Fred Vuich/SI

Talking about the U.S. Open without Saying Anything About Golf

I know that the U.S. Open is going on, one of the four majors and probably the toughest test of golf in the world.

Well, that is exactly why there isn’t much to say about the golf – a few players have finished with just a smidge more birdies than bogeys, but most people are hovering around the 73-74 mark. Tiger shot 71, and if I was a betting man, I’d say Phil Mickelson will be done playing golf before signing his scorecard come Friday afternoon.

But, two things that are probably the most interesting subplots – Ian Poulter is probably the most interesting dresser in any sport. Think about it – some of the things he wears (check above photo) make Clinton Portis look like he sports Grandma’s Sunday best.

Also, look at this photo of Tiger Woods.



You say golfers aren’t athletes? You say that golf is in the same conversation as poker or bowling? Really? Does this guy look like a dude you’d pick on at the driving range? He’s ENORMOUS! When do you think “Balco” and “Double Bogey” begin to be found in the same sentences?

Getting Ready for the Funeral

Well, if you're wondering why there is nothing about the U.S. Open, that is because it was posted over at Deadpin. If you haven't checked it out, just click here and enjoy the diction.

Also, check this out if you're interested in articles published by me on other websites. I wrote this up before starting up on the Gateway Tour in hopes of landing a little face time on SI.com.

When Thursday begins, so will Andy North and the "Two time U.S. Open champion" introduction. Hey, if you bought the Bentley, you better drive it around.

Hairball

I know it is Phil Mickelson, third highest paid athlete in the U.S. and second most talked-about golfer, but to his defense, Winged Foot wasn’t nearly the collapse that Adam Scott encountered Sunday.

The poor millionaire birdied 11 and 12 to get in a tie with eventual victor Woody Austin before deciding to toss the tournament away with a bogey-triple-birdie-bogey-bogey-bogey finish. Think about it like this – Scott birdied three of his final eight holes and still played them six over par.

For the Australian, this is his first tie leading a tournament after the third round and not notching the victory. For Austin, well….I guess you can just sum it up numerically – 62. Congrats.

All Sorts of "Golf" for your Sunday Entertainment

Since most good sports have taken the summer off, most networks have to really search for Sunday fill.

Luckily, if you’re a “golf” fan, go ahead and dial Dominoes, because you’ve got your day set on that comfy couch.

Right now on NBC is the Michael Douglas & Friends Celebrity Tournament, which includes Douglas, wife Catherine Zeta-Jones (worth DVR-ing) and studs like Kenny G and Alice Cooper. If you are in the mood to boost your golf ego, check out NBC and it will make you feel way better about your 30 yard slice.

At 3:00 ET, “The Ultimate Game” starts on Fox. I’m not sure, but I think this is just some guys playing for a ton of money in Las Vegas. Hum, couldn’t they film this every Sunday on every golf course somewhere in Vegas? Yeah, sounds right up my alley.

Now, for real golf, check out CBS at 3:00 and watch Adam Scott try to become even more hated by yours truly. Scott started the day with a three-shot lead but is leading by just a shot over Woody “Gangsta’s Paradise” Austin.

Oh God, Kenny G just brought out his saxophone and played a song for Alice Cooper and sadly, I’M NOT KIDDING. On second thought, maybe you should avoid NBC at all costs, even blocking it like one of the porn channels.

Sometimes It Gets Dark in Memphis

For some reason, when Marc Cohn sings that song, I expect Memphis to be this beautiful, exciting place - not some place where it gets so dark so early that not every golfer can finish his round…BUMMER.

Play was suspended due to darkness today with my favorite golfer to hate, Adam Scott, trying to win for the second time this year before a major. The Australian with the Justin Timberlake from N’Sync haircut shot 66 today to post seven under, one shot better than Brain….er, let me make sure this is correct….yep, Brian Gay.

Big Baby shot four over today and is hanging at the cut line at four over. I knew that this would be a tough round for John Daly (any round is tough when you have to lug around that pillow of a gut), but 74 might just do the job.

Well, since that is about it with the golf news and the Cavs got smoked last night like any random rolling paper on a “Cheech and Chong” set, I guess the sports world is ready for next week’s U.S. Open. To everyone that is forgetting, Tiger Woods hasn’t won a U.S. Open since 2002, his longest drought for any of the majors to date.

Player of the Daly

You know those moments when you wake up in the morning and just feel like going to the gym? Oh, come on…it’s one of those days you throw down a Pomegranate juice before you stretch and head to work out backs and biceps? You have no idea what I’m talking about? Well, then you probably have a lot in common with Dr. John Daly.

Daly’s popularity has always been odd to me – you’re talking about an alcoholic that has admitted to trashing hotel rooms and gambling millions of dollars away while divorcing more “ladies” than Hal Sutton and yet he is still one of the most popular golfers in the world. Wherever you stand with Big John, I’m a huge fan and always enjoy watching him finish a tournament without withdrawing.

Fredrik “Soul Patch” Jacobson and Adam “My Life Makes Yours Seem Petty” Scott are at the top of the leader board after the first day. TPC Southwind played pretty tough on Thursday, with more people shooting in the 80s (11) than breaking par (7).

Maybe it’s just me, but if the St. Jude people really want to attract golfers the week before the U.S. Open, maybe making it extremely difficult isn’t the best way to go about it. Who wants to get their ass kicked two weeks in a row?

David Toms LOVES Wind from the South

I have a buddy from Texas that played a little mini-tour golf in his day. The kid never seemed to get it together on tour, struggling on the different types of courses throughout the season and barely winning enough money to pay “bills.”

Anyway, my buddy could play at our home courses. I mean, PLAY. What does this have to do with anything? Well, early on in the St. Jude Classic, David Toms is once again in the lead. I know it is early, but I guess TPC Southwind sets up to his eye like the Wendy’s 99-cent menu must for Charles Barkley. The Shreveport native hasn't finished out of the top-10 in five years at this tournament.

Also playing well on Thursday includes Fredrik Jacobson (get the man more HAIR GEL!), Brandt Snedeker (try typing his last name five times fast), and Jose “My Mariaaaaaaaaaa” Olazabal.

The Golf Channel is showing coverage today, so if you want, mute the TV and download White Noise from ITUNES.

Bearrrrrrr Down

I know this is supposed to be all about golf, but I have to give some cookies to the Arizona Wildcat softball team.

While in Tucson, I wrote something about our lack of team championships and since then, our only true sports team has notched two trophies in a row.

I’ve noticed a few things since watching softball the past week – girls don’t hit a lot off good pitchers and the Arizona team is a lot hotter than that of Tennessee.

All in all, tonight is one of those nights you’re happy to be supporting the same team as Sandra Bullock’s character in Speed.

Golfers to play golf for St. Jude (and a million bucks)

It’s been a busy week in the world of “Dogs That Chase Cars.” Not only have I been glued to the television to see if my beloved Wildcats can win the soccer match that is the College Softball World Series, but I have been preparing for my first professional golf tournament, this week’s Gateway Tour tournament in Scottsdale.

Sadly, I missed the cut (68-76) but played well in the first round and have something to build on. Plus, I only made eight bogeys in the second round, which really brought my moral to an unbelievable and uncomfortable high (as many bogeys as pars, WATCH OUT EL TIGRE!).

With that personal information you probably don’t care about, the Cumulonimbus clouds are starting to roll in and before you know it the storm that is Oakmont will be upon us. I know that the St. Jude’s Classic is this week and David “Can I have Some Warm Milk Before Bedtime” Toms will be looking to win again TPC Southwind.

RANDOM NOTE: Who do you think at the PGA is in charge of naming the courses that TPC buys out? I mean, they have some no-brainers like TPC Scottsdale and TPC Myrtle Beach, but what about TPC Craig Ranch and TPC Sugarloaf? I wish I got paid to come up with this stuff – Sawgrass would definitely be TPC at Quadruple Bogey.

So, we have one week until the U.S. Open and a golf tournament with a reasonable field to fluff us before Tiger comes in for the money shot. Here are some things to watch:

My 2007 Life Mostly in the Rough - Remember in 2004 when John Daly hit that amazing bunker shot to take home the Buick Invitational and every golf writer worth his Ashworth pullover talked about how Big John was back? As my girlfriend would say, “Yeah, not so much.” Daly has as many withdrawals this year (3) as cuts made. I have a feeling that this might be the week he actually does something with his life.

Big Boys Do Big Things - Sergio Garcia, Mike Weir, Adam Scott, Vijah Singh, Geoff Ogilvy – which name will get himself (or herself) in “U.S. Open form.”

The Best Alternate of 2007 - Kevin Stadler is the Number One Alternate for the U.S. Open, which means if one guy’s wife happens to induce pregnancy, the Smaller of the Guts land a spot. If he wins this bad boy he won’t have to worry about it.

Ok, that will about do it. If you are enjoying the site make sure to comment and let me know, so I won’t take days off between posts.

Parade for Pampling

It is rare when writers (I am proclaiming myself a writer at this point) admit errors and mine came with the “major like feel” of the Memorial.

There is one golfer in the top 32 on the leader board that is in the top ten of Fedex Cup points, and that is Australian Adam Scott. Rod Pampling is leading, K.J. Choi (Woahhhheeeee) is in contention and Tiger Woods has as good a shot at winning as Phil Mickelson.

I would like to write interesting things about the third round, but all I can say is Will MacKenzie and Stewart Cink just jumped up to another big check. An interesting factoid – there are as many Australians in the top 10 as Americans. Thanks a lot Greg Norman.